The Anatomy of The Bachelorette Party

I am not a connoisseur of bachelorette parties. I think I have now been to two: my own and my friend Marie's that took place last weekend in DC. There might have been others, but honestly I must have fried those particular brain cells long ago. I can't recall one.

Mine was perfect. I met my closest friends at my favorite wine bar. They made me wear a flashy bride button and I wore the fake veil for about a nano-second. I still have all the banners and playing cards and such with which they decorated  wine bar (one day, maybe I'll take up scrap booking?). After snacks and cake and wine, we headed across the street to another favorite local haunt and that was it. No crazy stunts or stripping men or dancing or bar fights.

This bachelorette party was like in Opposite Land compared to my bachelorette! The night started off early with the bridal shower. Signature cocktails were consumed, games were played and presents were opened. Ribbons were intentionally broken as they want to have kids, pronto. The bride cried when she opened her KitchenAid Mixer and I cried because she was crying. I cut myself off after two (okay it was three) signature cocktails. I had to pace myself.

We had a short period of time between the shower and heading out for the bachelorette party. I took a "disco nap" for the first time in over a decade. Maybe not such a good idea, because it made me super groggy until I was able to find a cup of coffee! No matter, for we met up with the bride, her umpteen friends, and our snazzy, giant limo (I think it was a Hummer?). 

Bar #1 was a bust and we quickly moved on to a place called Tattoo. I didn't think we would be able to have any kind of fun because it was so crowded, but we finally carved a spot out for ourselves and danced the night away. I was ready to go for the long haul (the coffee kicked in for sure!), but the bride was three sheets to the wind by the time 1am rolled around and so we headed on back to the hotel to get the bride some much needed grease-by-way-of-pizza. The following photo was posted on Facebook and I think it summarizes the evening perfectly.

Note to self: that "lightly" shimmering eye shadow? Oh. My. God. Just say no. I'm throwing it out, like yesterday. My friends should tell me that my eye-shadow looks like I wrestled a stripper and stole her glitter. And the "dewy" Paula Dorf blush? Yeah, that makes me look like my eyeballs have sunken into their sockets. Why must my face look so pointy? I had taken off my pink tiara and my mask at this point. I should have left them on. Yikes. I look like a fuddy-duddy with my jacket and beads, but I didn't want to hold my jacket, so just kept it on. If you knew the Club Kid I used to be, you'd understand my self-deprecation.

The best part of the whole night was watching the bride get her groove on with her "Party Posse." It was wonderful that so many people came out to help her celebrate! At one point in the evening, she met a groom who was there for his bachelor party. Over the thump of the music I heard her scream, "When are you getting married? Isn't getting married THE BEST?!"

And she's right. Being married is the best. I just can't wait for her to experience it!

So what are your B-party plans? Are you going to throw it down like Marie or will it be more reserved, like mine? Do you think there are any pros or cons to either choice? Just know this, you must wear a stupid-something on your head. Must. It is a right of passage, regardless of whether you end up knuckle-dragging drunk or asleep by 10:30pm. Wear the veil or the mask or the tiara or the massive glasses, like Marie did. It is your one bachelorette requirement and will make your friends super-happy.

Thanks, Betty.

Last night was supposed to be a casual get together of my BFF's who were in town last night. We were going to meet up at Rumours Wine Bar, have a glass or two of wine and then maybe wander across the street to Mirror for a little tapas and the good company of chef/owners Mike and Colleen. If you are local and you have never been here, you are missing out. This is one of my favorite things on the menu (duh, of course it's dessert!)

Allow me to introduce Chocolate Soup. That, my friends is a deep fried, dark chocolate truffle nestled in a nest of whipped cream. The soup? That's melted white chocolate. It's thinned with something incredible tasty, probably butter. Imagine the oogey gooey chocolate mess when you dive into that truffle. This, my little blog-reading buddies, is pure genius.

But I digress. My good friends and partners in crime, Alecia and Michele set up Rumours in good ol' fashioned Bachelorette Party style. After complaining about parties and showers and what not, I got exactly what I wanted without even really knowing what I wanted!

All the best and important people in my life were there (Except for you, Marie!But she did send me a lovely text during the affair!) and we just laughed and had fun and everyone got along from different corners of my life. It was just awesome.

Alecia and Michele were kind enough not to bring penis crowns or sippy cups and all that stuff that I can't stand. I was forced to wear a veil for a brief period of time. I did come to enjoy wearing my blink-y Bride-to-Be button, although I did put up a stink about it at first. It was just an extra accessory I hadn't planned on, so had to warm up to the idea.

The best part of the night was the new woman Michele introduced into our fold of friends.

I'd like to introduce Betty. She was a little under-dressed for the affair and I question her accessory choices for the venue. That's a whip there on her wrist. Clearly she was enjoying the Prosecco a little too much. Lush.

We became fast friends though. Look how close we got in such a brief amount of time. Betty partook in all sorts of adventures, all night long. She really enjoyed the red velvet cake with cream cheese frosting.

Things got a little crazy though when we couldn't keep her off the pole.

She got a little out of hand at Mirror, so Kim had to kick her out. Here's Betty, gettin' the boot.

Thanks to everyone for the great night! I'm getting married tomorrow!

L.A. Barb, The Thirty-Something Bride, Aloha Alecia, D.C. Michele, California Cousin & MOH Sally, Nashville Kim, Atlanta Lisa. Woot! Woot!

I'd like to say congratulations to local bride and blog-reader, Sabine who is getting married TODAY! Best of luck and love to you today! I'll be thinking about you!